i'll be honest here for a second.
i've been self-harm clean for nearly 2 years as of the day i'm writing this.
this does not mean i'm happy all the time.
the suicidal thoughts like to come back at any minor inconvenience.
no matter how small it is, i become so angry it drives me to depression and then i want to kill myself.
this isn't even the worst part.

whenever i try to tell someone i know irl about how i feel, i get ridiculed and pretty much ignored.

i only get help when it's too late.
when i already harmed myself.